P.B. Slices: The Funner Peanut Butter Eick October 2, 2008 Bizarre, Condiments 8 Comments I’ve written several times in the past about so called “products of convenience” that really aren’t convenient or where it is questionable that anyone is asking for them. But P.B. Slices a.k.a. “The Funner Peanut Butter” may take the cake as the most utterly ridiculous product I have seen yet. My pal Brendan, over at Endless Simmer has brought this wonderful product to my attention, along with Thursday Night Smackdown. However, as JoeHoya of Capital Spice observes, we have the talented researchers at Oklahoma State University to thank for this creation. Brendan refused to link to the company’s website, but you know what? I will. Why? For no other reason than to alert you to the fact that their slogan is “The Funner Peanut Butter.” Now putting aside the fact that “funner” isn’t even a word, what exactly makes these peanut butter slices more fun then regular peanut butter? Is it the fact that you have to remove them from cellophane wrapping? That you can roll them up or wrap them around things? I always thought the most fun part of peanut butter was that it was a little messy. Plus, it’s one of the few foods you can eat out of the jar without feeling THAT guilty. So what would you use these P.B. Slices for?Â Well the website has a couple suggestions: On waffles or pancakes? Really? Is that a thing? Do people actually eat peanut butter on those products?Â Also, I would be failing to do my job properly if I didn’t point out the ridiculousness of the picture that accompanies that list.Â Dude, that girl is LOVING her mom right now.Â Why? Probably because her mom bought her P.B. slices. Note to parents: if you don’t buy P.B. slices for your kids, they will most likely stop loving you.Â That’s right, nothing says “I’m a good parent” like teaching your kids to be as lazy as possible when it comes to meal assembly, and to always, always, go with the pre-packaged, preservative laden “convenient” form of any food. The following two tabs change content below.BioLatest Posts Eick Latest posts by Eick (see all) Surge Wins Discontinued Foods Bracket! - April 12, 2013 Discontinued Foods Bracket FINAL VOTE: Surge vs. Planter’s Cheez Balls - April 10, 2013 Discontinued Foods Bracket Final Four! Surge vs. Ecto Cooler - April 8, 2013 8 Responses Lemmonex October 2nd, 2008 I have been, in earnest, trying to track these down for weeks for try for the Wednesday column. They are elusive. Reply dani October 2nd, 2008 I’m a pb freak so I want them, haha. And I have to say, yes, some people eat pb on their pancakes and waffles. My brother, now 31, always put pb on his waffles as a kid with syrup. So gross… Reply Eick October 2nd, 2008 Lem – Unfortunately it looks like most of the places that sell it are in the North or Southwest. The site has a list of retail outlets that sell it. Nothing on the east coast. Reply Hillary October 2nd, 2008 Weird! I can’t even imagine this! Real peanut butter all the way. Reply calexander13 October 3rd, 2008 I’m surprised you haven’t mentioned the sinister astronaut-related implications of this foodstuff. This is obviously another part of the government’s plan to turn normal, ordinary citizens into ASTRONAUTS. Protect yourselves. Don’t trust anyone wearing a shiny helmet or chewing gum! Reply Leave a Reply Cancel Reply Your email address will not be published. Name* Email* Website Comment Current ye@r * Leave this field empty Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Notify me of new posts by email.