Hmmm…about a year ago Eick sent me some food in the mail, and I made a promise I could not keep….at the time.  I could give everyone a long-drawn-out excuse for my writing truancy…but… THE STIX BECKON. Shape and Texture: They are stix goddamn it.  Like a thick cracker cut into some stix.  Stix.  Good [...]

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After defending Taco Bell time and time again, they have stabbed me in the back. If there are two things that should never be combined it’s seafood with fast food, and Taco Bell has done just that with the following abomination. Some of you crazy freaks LIKE fish and tacos. Give me a break and [...]

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This is more of a paean to retain my sanity than a proper food post. As I perused the site yesterday I realized that Eick had posted a small blurb about 88 cent crunchwraps. My neck snapped with a double-take. The mythical crunchwrap? 88 cents? It’s obviously a ploy. A ruse. Forget the fact that [...]

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The extended title that drops down two lines is a metaphor for true excess of this burger. This has been covered elsewhere, but Eick sent me some coupons for free burgers and I figured my colon could take the abuse. I also picked up a large Coke and medium fries to accompany the gargantuan Angus [...]

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The other day whilst trudging through a wind-whipped four-degree day in Chicago, I wander past McDonald’s on my way to the grocery store.  Even in the vacuum of a negative degree wind chill, the stark aroma of McDonald’s penetrates my frozen nostrils, awakening cilia long assumed dead. It is a curious scent, one that evokes [...]

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A couple weeks (or months) ago Eick sent me an email asking me if I enjoyed coffee. As a grad student still working a regular job, I simply chewed on the coffee grounds I store in my cheek and answered, “Yes Eick, of course.” Baconfreak.com, the same company that brought you Bacon Floss (don’t try [...]

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Hop onto a sports related site and leave your ads unblocked.  There’s probably a 20% chance that you happen upon a new viral ad campaign starring the lesser Manning (Eli), Venus Williams, Apollo Anton Ono and Shaquille O’Neal. The performance enhancing foodstuff they are advertising?  Oreos. This is Kraft foods going for an edgier ad [...]

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You are what you eat, as they say.  Did they also say that we would be smashing together fish genes to create really cheap blobs of meat in the shape of fish? Ah science, you giveth and giveth and giveth.  But sometimes you give too much, and today it’s the FDA helping science give us [...]

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The father of one of the great stoner foods of all time, the cheesy doodle, died yesterday at the age of 90. That’s right, friends. Remove your orange fingertips from your bag of cheetohs and stare at them. Morrie Yohai is responsible for those powdery orange fingertips, especially the part that gets stuck under your [...]

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This has been making the rounds on the Nets for a couple days, but it frankly needs to be posted everywhere. Alex Blagg parodies the man filming and narrating his shots of a double rainbow, with…well, you should just watch it. You should watch both of them really. Just incredible.

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