Granted, the title of this post sounds strange, but consider following excruciating choice:
Option #1: You have to eat a squishy over-ripe banana every day for the rest of your life.
Option #2: You can never eat anything that could be classified as “dessert” ever again.
Things to consider:Â Have you ever brought a banana to work thinking you were so swell?Â “Hey, look at me, I try to eat fruit once a day!” you say to yourself.Â Your smug feelings are soon replaced by a gag-inducing realization:Â YOUR BANANA HAS GONE SOFT.Â Like super-soft, to the point, that it is barely able to maintain its banana-form when you peel away its epidermis.Â And you have to eat one of theses monstrosities once a day…for the rest of your life.Â Now when I say eat, I mean EAT. As in straight on, just the banana. You cannot grind it up into a smoothie, chop it up and put on top of cereal, or slather it in peanut butter. You must eat it all by itself.
Unless you decide to give up dessert.Â No more creme brulee? Dah!Â It’s terrible just writing that sentence.Â And I can’t even put the little accent over the “e” at the end of brulee.Â Sad.Â For others, this means no more strawberry ice cream.Â Or cheese cake.Â Or this heart-rending scenario: It’s the end of another brutal day at work, and the only thing you want to do is sit down and watch your favorite episode of Magnum P.I. while clutching a pint of Haagen Daaz.Â Only you don’t have that option anymore.Â It’s just you and Tom Selleck’s mustache.Â Here’s the thing: there is no cheating.Â You may say, “Oh Cary, it’s so simple to give up sweets.Â No one is that weak.”Â What I mean is this: you can’t ever have it, EVER again.Â So yes, in the short term it may seem like an easy decision.Â But ten years down the road, when you’re still working the same job, and that same episode of Magnum P.I. comes on where Ted Danson’s character is killed by a boat propeller, YOU’LL WANT THAT ICE CREAM.Â Trust me.