Two competitive eating competitions took place over the weekend, the Krystal Burger Square Off, and the very first Ramen noodle eating contest, which was part of a launch party for the new video game Naruto.

After losing the the chicken wing and waffle eating contests to rising star Pat “Deep Dish” Bertoletti, hot dog eating champion Joey “Jaws” Chestnut was hungry (get it, hungry?) for revenge. He won the competition, eating 103 burgers in just 8 minutes, while in a huge upset, Bertoletti was edged out for 2nd place by 7th ranked “Humble Bob” Shoudt.

“I hope this cute blonde has a fetish for stretchy stomachs”

The ramen noodle contest is not an event with any sort of history, but was the first of it’s kind. It was strangely paired with a Nintendo launch party in NYC. The event was won by Tim “Eater X” Janus, who downed 10.5 pounds of ramen noodles in 10 minutes.

“Competitive Eating? This looks like a Tuesday in my frat house.”

Oh competitive eating. The trainwreck of America’s food news. So disgusting yet so intriguing.

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