Being a night owl has two negatives: 1) scary noises, and 2) missing breakfast. The former can be countered by turning up the TV volume. The latter, however, is much more troubling, because breakfast is clearly the best meal. Of course, homemade breakfast can be had at any time of the day. There’s nothing stopping you from making omelettes at 8 PM, no matter what conventional wisdom says. In fact, more power to you. Fuck convention.

Where it becomes a problem is when you enjoy fast food breakfast as much as I do. McDonald’s is my favorite. I could live on McMuffins, Sausage Biscuits, McGriddles and those buttery, greasy, oblong Hash Brown pucks. Granted, not for very long, but it would be the happiest 2 months of my life. Unfortunately, McDonald’s stops serving breakfast at 10:30. So too do Carl’s Jr, Burger King and Taco Bell, if you prefer one of those. And that’s a damn shame.

mcdonalds-logo

On the rare occasion that I do wake up by 10:25, I usually throw on a coat and whatever footwear is nearby, and go grab some delicious breakfast. Mostly McDonald’s, but ever since Carl’s Jr got those damn delicious biscuits, they’ve entered my regular rotation. Burger King breakfast sucks, and Taco Bell’s is solid but I’d have to drive 20 minutes for it and that ain’t happening. Of course, Sonic and Jack in the Box are both pretty good, but the fact that they have it all day makes it less exciting. There’s a feeling of satisfaction after eating McDonald’s breakfast that derives solely from the limited hours.

Now, I’m perfectly fine with having just two good fast food breakfast choices. In fact, adding a third would almost ruin it because I would have to wake up early more often just to get my fix of each one. But I decided that the risk was worth it because I just had to find out about Wendy’s breakfast.

wendys_breakfast

Wendy’s has had breakfast for a few years now, if memory serves. In fact, I remember eating their breakfast at least 10 years ago in an airport. But as far as their current offerings, I’d say a few years. You may be wondering what the hell I’m talking about because you’ve never seen Wendy’s breakfast. Well it’s only at select locations so shut up. So select, in fact, that none of the three locations nearest me have it. I did a little research before making the trip and found a number of interesting offerings. A breakfast burger, biscuits, paninis, burritos, oatmeal, home fries, etc. The incomplete menu can be found here. I knew I wanted to make a review out of it, but it was going to take a couple of visits to try everything.

For my first visit, I had to get the sausage, egg and cheese biscuit, because that’s right up my alley, whatever that means. I also went with the Sunny Side burger and some home fries. It all cost me about 8 bucks with tax.

sausage-egg-and-cheese-biscuit

I began with the burger. It featured an egg, bacon, Asiago cheese, Hollandaise sauce and a burger patty, all on a “honey-wheat artisan muffin,” which sounds like something the characters on “Portlandia” would really enjoy, although I’m not sure if it’s local. For starters, the bacon was great. It was cooked just perfectly: not crunchy, not chewy, right in between. And with three pieces, there was good coverage. The egg was also good – it was an actual fried egg like you might make at home, as opposed to a rubbery, yellow sheet made from a eggy mixture. The Asiago was just OK. It was not loaded with flavor, but at the very least it was creamy.

Unfortunately, the positives end there. Normally I really like Wendy’s burgers, but this meat was absolutely pathetic. It may as well have been a piece of wet cardboard, because it was not seasoned at all. It seemed like it had been soaked in water and all of the flavor escaped. I also was not a fan of the Hollandaise sauce. I really don’t have much experience with Hollandaise sauce so I can’t say theirs was bad, all I know is I didn’t like it. It was kind of lumpy and very tart. And then there’s the “artisan” bun. It was bland, dry, and a little tough. So the Sunny Side burger had some good components, but they were outweighed heavily by the bad. I give it 4/10.

wendys-breakfast-biscuit

After the burger debacle, I was really counting on the biscuit to save the day. I had high hopes because there’s really no way you can mess up a sausage, egg and cheese biscuit. First off, the sausage was typical of fast food sausage, which is to say it was deliciously savory. It also seemed slightly thicker than the competitors. The egg was the same as on the other sandwich, nothing new there. The American cheese was unremarkable. But the most important part of any biscuit sandwich is obviously the biscuit. This one was buttery, moist and fluffy on the inside, as with any good biscuit. In an interesting twist, however, the outside did not have the usual crispiness of a fast food biscuit. It wasn’t bad at all, just different. In all, Wendy’s did well with this sandwich, and it deserves 8.5/10.

cheese-biscuit-wendys

Finally, we have America’s favorite side item: potatoes. Wendy’s take is a little different than any other fast food hash browns I’ve had, which are normally in patty, stick, or little round form. Wendy’s says they are “skin-on, natural-cut, home-style potatoes seasoned with sea salt, cracked pepper and garlic powder.” They call them “Seasoned Home-Style Potatoes,” I call them home fries. Potayto, potahto. These were pretty decent little spuds. They were seasoned well, with salt, pepper and garlic all present. There’s not really much else to say about them. A solid 7/10.

potato-side-wendys

Overall, my first experience with Wendy’s breakfast was a positive one. Two out of the three items I tried were worth ordering again. The price wasn’t too high either, with the two sandwiches going for about $6 total, and the potatoes for 99¢. The Honey Butter Chicken Biscuit is at the top of my list for next time. Also on the list are the panini, burrito and oatmeal. Part two of this review is coming soon to theaters everywhere. In the meantime, check here to see if Wendy’s offers breakfast near you. Update: Part two of the Wendy’s breakfast review can be found here. If you’re lucky enough, get out there and try it, and let us know what you think!

Happy holidays, y’all!

6 Responses

  1. Don L.

    Closest breakfast Wendy’s about 3 hours away. I would definitely go to one if they were closer.

    Reply
  2. Bill M

    If you want anyone to take you seriously, it would behoove you to leave out disgusting and vulgar comments like “F— convention”. Not everyone reading this “column” is under 30 with no regard for others’ tastes and sensibilities.

    Reply
  3. Bill M

    …and now I see my comment is “awaiting moderation”. Really. How interesting that you might find what someone else writes as offensive.

    Reply
  4. Eick

    Hey Bill – you are free to read or not read this column/site. We do not censor our writers here in regards to profanity, they are free to use it when they deem appropriate.

    Also, your comment was only held for moderation to prevent spam since you hadn’t commented here before. You are more than welcome to share your thoughts freely.

    Reply
  5. Rick C

    Wendy’s breakfast is kind of like the rumor that you wish was true… I’ve never stumbled across a restaurant that offered it.

    Reply

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