I was recently reading about the action in Ames, Iowa, site of the every-four-year straw poll to determine the front-runner for the Republican nomination.  This year, the key factor that decided the event flew under the radar… it was the food (probably).

Former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty was looking good at the start.  He brought in Famous Dave’s barbecue for his tent, and people were lining up.  Dare I say, but there was buzz in the air.  People wooed by the smokey siren song of pit BBQ were only too weak to file in in droves.  But then this tweet broke: “Crisis alert: Pawlenty tent has run out of BBQ. Repeat: no more left.”  Simple as that, with the disappearance of the food went Pawlenty’s chances in the race.  Empty chafing dish = poor decision-maker, no commander-in-chief potential.  He would pull out 24 hours later.

So who did that leave?  Minnesota Representative Michelle Bachmann.

Bachmann seized upon her opportunity, despite having food that was several rungs below the aforementioned candidate.  Bachmann had “giant corn dogs and trompe l’oeil ‘beef sundaes’ that consisted of a scoop of mashed potatoes topped with chunks of beef, a ladle of gravy and a cherry tomato.”  Perhaps it’s not a shock that she didn’t run out of food.  Seriously, beef sundaes?  I know this is America’s heartland, but this is the type of catering that brings in the swing voters?

Despite the questionable choices, Bachmann kept the deep fryers and ice cream scoops going, and managed to win the contest.  No word on what second-place candidate Ron Paul had in his tent, but you can be sure it was expressly authorized by the Constitution.

As for the dark horse, Rick Perry… he don’t need no stinkin’ tent.

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