Underground coffeehouse in France, 1789: revolutionists gather for a strategy meeting. A man reads to a restless crowd. Hands gesture vehemently, causing coffee to splash on coat sleeves. Rebellious shouts cause spittle to fly.

For all the talk of rebellion in 1780s French coffeehouses, I bet none of the revolutionists stopped to consider the controversy that would one day befall the very drink being served right under their noses: coffee.

Of all food and drink, coffee is an item that has garnered some of the most varied and strongly-held preferences. The way I see it, there are four main ways to drink coffee:

1. Black

You’re a cowboy, a purist, a seasoned professional. Ain’t nothin’ gonna taint your hardcore morning (or midnight, whatever) drink.

2. Cream and sugar

The energy you can handle, the taste of dirty water you cannot. Who wouldn’t want a little creamy sweetness to take the edge off?

3. Frou-frou

Latte, mocha, foam, blended, frozen, caramel, whipped cream, raspberries…the possibilities are endless! Restricting yourself to one drink is boring. Here’s to the land of opportunity and 15-instruction orders at Starbucks.

4. Coffee is gross

You’re sick. You’re all sick.

So, what’ll it be?

[poll id=”153″]

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Sam

My name is Sam and all I care about is food.

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10 Responses

  1. Jessi

    There are so many more ways to drink coffee than just these four!

    I ritually put heavy cream in mine, but never sugar or any other type of sweetener. Some of my friends use only sweeteners, but never cream.
    And then you have to factor in different flavors of coffee. Do you flavor it or take it straight? When I brew mine in the morning I put a dash of cinnamon in the filter to get a cinnamon undertone, and if I’m feeling particularly edgy I’ll throw some cloves in there.

    tl;dr: I take my coffee flavored with a dash of cinnamon and with heavy cream.

    Reply
  3. Comic

    I’ll drink espresso straight, but drip coffee needs cream and sugar.

    Am I weird?

    Reply
  4. Sam

    @Jessi – I love your complex and sophisticated opinions regarding how you take your coffee! Though you may not take part in the Starbucks corporate coffee culture, you sound like you like to experiment/play around with your coffee, which is what I think I was getting at with the Frou-Frou option. Think there’s any way I can get a peppermint flavor out of my coffee using a trick similar to your cinnamon trick?

    @Comic – Nope! But can I ask why?

    Reply
  8. Eick

    @jessi

    Cinnamon? cloves? That is most definitely frou frou as it doesn’t fall in the traditional black/cream/sugar categories that most Americans usually go with.

    Reply
  9. Pam

    It depends on the time of day! =)
    7am-12pm black – have to wake up
    12pm -3pm frou frou – need a pick me up
    3pm – 7pm cream and sugar – after dinner up
    7pm -2am decaffe – so eyes won’t stay up
    2am – 7am grounds only – why am I up

    Reply
  10. Arwyn

    Depends on my mood. Most of the time I’m a cream and sugar type of girl, but when I’m feeling like something special and overly expensive, I’ll splurge on a Capt’n Crunch Frap (Strawberries and Cream, shots of Toffee Nut and Hazelnut syrup, whipped cream blended in).

    Reply

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