Since the early 1900′s when cafeterias first began serving trays of mystery meat to hungry scholars in the public school system, there’s always been someone behind the counter slinging hash and taking names. And since the inception of Sloppy Joe Tuesdays, displeased kids have taken it upon themselves to find a hair net sporting scapegoat [...]

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Kids, forget the Fall back to school fashion trends when it comes to impressing your peers. It’s that seemingly lowly lunch box that can make or break your rep for an entire academic year. Clothing is never a constant, whereas that portable food delivery system you’re saddled with, toting whatever fresh Hell your Mom Ziploc’d, [...]

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With heat wave season in full effect, cooking meals the old school way can transform your once tranquil prep space into a literal Hell’s Kitchen.  As the mercury continues to skyrocket, most people seek relief via an outdoor grill or ordering delivery from the comfort of a kiddie pool. While BBQing is an acceptable alternative [...]

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Not everything in the world of Fast Food is all baked apple pies & Happy Meals, kids. Some spokes-creatures are far more disturbing than pink slime and McRibs combined. While marketing executives labor long hours coming up with new Mascots to entice hungry dollar holders through door & arches, often the results are abominations that [...]

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Stabbing food with sticks and toting them around as you nibble isn’t anything new. Any toothpick will tell you that. In recent years however, this type of delivery system has mutated to the point of excess, thanks in no small part to State & County Fair vendors trying to become the next deep fried Snickers [...]

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Only a few days until you’ll be scrambling for that last minute Father’s Day gift. Like so many before you, possessing limited creativity and/or an anemic bank account, it will likely boil down to the tried and true “eeny meeny miny mo” method of either socks or a necktie. Some call these the classics. Your [...]

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I pride myself on being a BBQ enthusiast. However, due to a recent raccoon infestation in my Broil King, I’ve been forced to grill choice cuts of meat on a puny table top hibachi I found at a yard sale. Now, late at night, I scour the net, living vicariously through Google images by fawning [...]

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Oh, the lucrative world of lawsuits. In America, it’s your right to seek monetary vengeance on those who have done you wrong. Whether it be that severed finger you placed deliberately in your chili at Wendy’s or maybe your unsupervised kid almost drowning in the ball pit at Chuck E Cheese. While, I’d stay up [...]

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Since the dawn of Mankind, when Homo Erectus Hilfiger started sporting stylish fur one pieces, there’s always been a connection between our food & fashion. These days, thanks to our food obsessed culture, we’ve managed to take these two passions to an entirely new level of art form. One that ranges from the deliciously white [...]

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I lost my Urban Legend virginity to “Mikey”, the picky pitch kid for “Life” cereal during the 70′s. I can still vividly recall the first time hearing about his “Final Destination” worthy death many years ago, as the story made the rabid rounds at my middle school playground. For the two people who’ve never heard [...]

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