Review: Frosted Toast Crunch Cereal

I’m just going to put it out there: I love sugary cereal. Lucky Charms, Froot Loops, Frosted Flakes, Reese’s Puffs…you get the picture. I’ve been known to take down half a box in one sitting, no milk necessary. Cinnamon Toast Crunch has long been one of my favorites. Who doesn’t enjoy licking pure cinnamon sugar off their fingers? I certainly do. I also have fond memories of Cinnamon Toast Crunch’s long lost brother, French Toast Crunch. It’s been so long I don’t remember what it tastes like, but I remember it being awesome. Now General Mills has added a new variety to the mix: Frosted Toast Crunch.

Frosted Toast Crunch is described as “frosted vanilla squares” with a “dash of cinnamon.” I headed to Wal-Mart to see if I could track this bad boy down. While strolling down the cereal aisle, I saw some interesting things. For example, since when are there 12 different flavors of Cheerios? Peanut butter? Dulce de Leche? Fruit?! Who knew? Also, Chocolate Frosted Flakes. That sounds like overkill. And diabetes. Anywho, I grabbed me a box of Frosted Toast Crunch and headed home for a taste test.

There’s only one way to try a new variety of junk food: on the couch, watching TV. On this particular night, I watched Modern Family as I dumped cereal in my mouth. Everyone needs to watch that show, it’s amazing. After a number of garbled guffaws, I had had enough. When you have to work to get your hand in the box, it’s time to stop eating. Seriously though, General Mills, bigger boxes. Adults eat this stuff too. So Frosted Toast Crunch passed the couch test. I was able to eat through an entire sitcom.

I wouldn’t say the flavor screams vanilla. If the box hadn’t said it, I wouldn’t have known that’s what they were going for. I would describe it as more of a…pure sugar flavor. The coating is definitely sprinkled on liberally, as with Cinnamon Toast Crunch. As for the alleged “dash of cinnamon,” it must have been a very small dash, because I got no cinnamon flavor. The overall flavor was pretty monotonous. It’s Cinnamon Toast Crunch, sans cinnamon. The cereal square itself has good toasted rice and wheat flavor, and packs a delightful crunch.

My next test was eating this cereal with milk. While reading the comics. It’s the purest form of cereal-eating. I don’t know about you, but I read the funnies from top to bottom, left to right. It’s called OCD. I also skip Doonesbury (maybe when I’m 50 I’ll find it funny), and Mutts (maybe when I’m 50, and my only friends are stray dogs and cats, I’ll find it funny.)

I enjoyed eating Frosted Toast Crunch with milk. It held up ok, retaining some of its crunchiness and most of its flavor. I’m not one to drink the milk at the end (blasphemous, I know), but if I had, I would imagine it basically tastes like really sugary milk. While we’re on this topic, is it just me, or does Cereal Milk make no sense? Why would you pay money for this? I literally just made some myself in 5 minutes. People will overpay for anything that looks cool.

Frosted Toast Crunch is about what you’d expect from a sugary cereal. It’s basically Cinnamon Toast Crunch without the delicious cinnamon flavor. It’s nothing to write home about, but it’s not bad either. If you’re looking for something new to snack on, and you like diabetes and licking your fingers, give it a whirl.