As first reported, and lauded, here – Ben & Jerry’s new clever concoction, Schweddy’s Balls ice cream, apparently is not so appealing to everyone.  A right-wing group called One Million Moms, a branch of the American Family Association, is threatening a boycott if the company continues to produce this flavor.

According to the group,“Ben & Jerry’s announced their newest ice cream flavor which sounds anything but appealing. Schweddy Balls is the best they could come up with. The vulgar new flavor has turned something as innocent as ice cream into something repulsive.”

Point of clarification: The AFA is a group that “declares that homosexuality is unnatural and sinful” – so you clearly know they have a good perspective on the world.  When it comes to values, they are the shining beacon.

This “protest” is not the first for the group, for they have also sought out almost every major brand in the country for doing such outrageous things as supporting same-sex partner employee benefits and LGBT activism. Shame on them!

I guess it is only a matter of time before these publicity suck-ups turn to other products.  From the food department, the likely suspects:
•    Pirate’s Booty popcorn: far too suggestive
•    Rice-A-Roni: the ‘San Francisco Treat’ features a town that is way too gay-friendly
•    Atomic Fireballs: see above, under “Schweddy”
•    Mike and Ike: Two guys? Could be homo-erotic –and they aren’t taking any chances
•    Grape-Nuts: Nuts… balls? Too close for comfort
•    Blow pops: Talk about a lay-up
•    Lay’s potato chips: What about the children!
•    Fighting cock bourbon: Liquid satan, plus a phallus to boot
•    Good and Plenty: too promiscuous
•    Schmitts Gay Beer: Nahh – they probably wouldn’t mind this one

What am I missing, readers?  Where will One Million Moms strike next??

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JT

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14 Responses

  1. Chefprotoss

    I hope no one tells them what urban dictionary’s definition of a chili dog is… Also, I had no desire to buy this before, but now I really want some.

    Reply
  2. Chefprotoss

    This got me thinking, and I have to ask, what does this have to do with children? B&J’s doesn’t advertise on tv at all as far as I know, and its not like phish food or cherry garcia turned anyone, yet alone a child, into an acid dropping hippie. On top of that even if it was called “sweaty balls”, what kid would be scarred for life or somehow turned into a criminal by hearing it? The AFA is clearly filled with bigoted idiots whose kids will probably rebel and get into more trouble than other normal kids the first chance they get.

    Reply
  3. Heidi

    Shouldn’t they all be spending their free time with their kids and not worrying about something so ridiculous?
    And heaven help the kids that want a whoopie pie..

    Reply
  4. Brian

    i finally found some…the ice cream is delicious. slight hint of rum with the first taste of the ice cream. The Fudge balls have a strong rum taste, but it is good. The Malted balls are just that, nothing special. I plan on buying a few just to make sure I have extra for when it gets pulled off the shelf.

    Reply

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