Due to gentle goading from Eick, I shall wade into the beautiful, twisted world of Would You Rather.

Option #1: You can never drink coffee again

cup-of-coffee

Option #2: You can never drink soda again.

soda

Things to consider: A wonderfully legalized drug, caffeine chews you up, spits you out and laughs in your face. You feel great one minute, the next you’re crashing, staring at your computer screen and refreshing the page of your favorite website as you wished you could just pass out in the supply closet. It tastes good (if you find a good shop) and it keeps you regular by golly! Can be incredibly addictive.

Soda is sugar, and if you’re like me you enjoy the added allure of caffeine that Coke, Diet Coke and Mountain Dew among others provide. On a hot summer day, it sometimes doesn’t get any better than an ice cold Coke in a glass bottle. That being said, if you leave a tooth in a glass of Coke for 20 minutes it will dissolve. Can also be incredibly addictive! Fun!

Also, feel free to comment on how you don’t drink coffee and that tea is truly the superior hot caffeinated beverage. You’re just lying to yourself.

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17 Responses

  1. Sean

    This is pretty easy. I gave up soda in 8th grade after a stomach bleeding incident… but I drink coffee everyday

    Reply
  2. KevinB

    That canard about Coke being “too acidic” is just so wrong. Coke’s pH is about 2.5 (neutral is 7), but stomach acid has a pH of 1, which means it’s even MORE acidic.

    I practically live on Diet Coke, but the thought of never having a fresh cup of coffee for breakfast is heartbreaking.

    Reply
  3. Cassie

    Tough call….but in the long run I feel that coffee is more natural without all the chemicals (especially organic), therefore better for you.

    Reply
  4. Justin

    I’m on my second try giving up soda. The first time was after my son was born at the start of the year. I did it for a month, then I realized it wasn’t helping my heartburn and I didn’t really feel different after the long run.

    This time, me and a friend are doing it, and so far so good.

    It came down to ingesting all the chemicals and sugar found in soda. As a backup, I started drinking Caribou iced coffees.

    http://www.cariboucoffee.com/page/1/beverage-food-detail.jsp?id=1446&type=drink

    Ingredients:
    Cold milk, espresso and ice

    Reply
  5. Cary

    I know, the tooth dissolving thing is a myth, but why not try to propagate hilarious rumors like this. The internet kills all the mystery of the world.

    Also, Coffee forever!!!

    Reply
  6. Alexiel

    I already don’t drink coffee, so cola all the way! Although I try to limit myself to one can per day.

    Reply
  7. will s

    One can a day? To heck with that. Anything worth doing is worth doing in excess!

    Reply
  8. Kevin

    The Snopes report is miss-leading. First, it compares fruits to Coke, stating that an orange has similar acidity. This ignores the fact that very few people eat several oranges a day – while millions drink several sodas a day. Second, it states that the liquid does not stay in tbe mouth long enough to cause damage. This ignores the effect of repeated exposure, day after day, can after can, sip after sip. It adds up, just like the wind and rain erode stone. Lastly, it ignores the fact that the Dental industry has decades of observation of increased tooth decay related to soda consumption. Millions of grade school kids have repeated the experiment of watching a tooth decompose in a glass of Coke. Pretending all of this is silly. Drink what you wish, as an informed adult, and in moderation.

    Reply

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