Dear AMC Movie Theaters,

I just got back from a midnight showing of Batman:The Dark Knight. (Which, I might add for my readers, was dope, dope, dope. Go see it. And I’m not just saying that because I have a giant asexual crush on Christopher Nolan and every movie he makes).

Prior to the movie beginning, I had a craving, as I often do at movie theaters, for the delectable sweet & sour flavor of Sour Patch Kids. So I went to the concession stand and said “Sour Patch Kids please.” Did they say, “sorry we don’t have those, but we do have Sour Jacks”? No. Instead, they just handed me the Sour Jacks as if they were simply the same thing. If I’m going to pay $4 for a bag of candy, it damn well better be the actual candy I want.

Now some of you candy purchasers over at AMC are probably thinking, “well Sour Jacks are similar enough to Sour Patch Kids, what’s this candy elitist complaining about?” Uh, no, they aren’t. If you think that they are, you clearly do not have a discerning palate when it comes to sour gummy candies. Because quite frankly, compared to Sour Patch Kids, Sour Jacks are liking eat a handful of horseshit.

YES!

No!

Fortunately for you, AMC, I was so riveted by Batman that 3 minutes into the movie I forgot I was even holding Sour Jacks, and didn’t eat any of them after the movie started. I’ll let you slide this time AMC, but only because it’s 3:45 am and I’m still jacked up on energy from the movie. But I’ll be watching you AMC, I’ll be watching.

Love always,

So Good

35 Responses

  1. Toby

    My boyfriend could not agree with you more. Every time we go to that AMC in Georgetown, he bitches about this!

    Reply
  2. toby's boyfriend

    AMC theaters phased out sour patch kids some years ago. believe me, i was livid. i was making those candy counter girls dig through storage rooms, drawers, broom closets convinced that there must be at least one lonely bag left behind. sour jacks are a joke. sometimes, AMC will have the sour patch watermelons….which will suffice if desparate, but i enjoy more variety with my ‘patches. it’s easier to just stock up on the big bags from a CVS or other drug store and take them to the movies with you. it’s far cheaper too.

    Reply
  3. Jim L

    I love the statement ‘Sour Jacks are like Horseshit.’ Funny, because I agree.

    They actually taste like chemically enhanced horseshit with rotten sugar.

    Reply
  4. clea

    sour jacks stick in your teeth and are like eating those shitty wax lips if they were covered in sour sugar crap.

    they are worse than getting raisins or floss (from that fucking dentist down the street) in your bag when trick or treating.

    we look forward to your arrival and introducing you to the most artery clogging yet delicious cheese fries.

    Reply
  5. Minjae

    I did a double take on that Sour Jack box where it says “Mouth Puckering” candy. Can you guess what I thought it said on the box? 😉

    Reply
  7. Candy Man

    I have to admit that I disagree with you whole-heartedly. I consider myself a sour candy connoisseur and can clearly taste the difference between SPKs and SJs, but I think SJs are far superior. I do think AMC should not try and hide the fact that they aren’t selling SPKs, they should embrace it.
    Blockbuster also sells SJs and I often go there not to rent a movie, but just to buy this candy.

    Reply
  9. Brian

    I go to Blockbuster just to buy Sour Jacks too. I love Sour Patch Kids, but Sour Jacks take the cake. They have the perfect chewy-ness and a more ‘sour factor’ to them. Sour Patch are much softer and sweeter. Sour Patch Kids are just marketed more, if not better, so thats all people know and taste. When they see Sour Jacks, they think “what the heck are these?” Sour Jacks win, too bad they are the underdogs.

    Reply
  11. Catrena

    tried the sour jacks at movie theater and love them ever since, which they were in more stores. Went on Amazon.com to get the tubes and they are not in stock. Love and will eat them anytime ove sour patch, I am always searching for an extreme sour candy and this top it

    Reply
  12. Fabio

    you people are crazy! i PREFER SOUR JACKS amillion times more. sour patch are okay but there too soft and sweet. sour jacks are harder,chewier, and ALOT sourererrererererrr. and iam glad but i guess i could agree that they should have both sour jacks and sour patch

    Reply
  13. Bryan5540

    Gotta agree that Sour Jacks are superior to the Sour Patch Kids. Don’t get me wrong I won’t turn down some SPK’s, but whenever I go to AMC I make it a point to buy some Sour Jacks. Thanks for the tip on them being at Blockbuster. I haven’t been to one of those in ages, but may have to make a trip to pick up some Jacks.

    Reply
  15. Bryan

    If you don’t like Sour Jacks, why did you purchase them? By purchasing the Sour Jacks you are supporting AMC’s decision to replace Sour Patch Kids with Sour Jacks. How about you write to the company instead of bitching about it in a blog. If they get enough interest from customers, they will switch back to Sour Patch Kids.

    Reply
  17. Chase

    ohhmyyy sour jacks are the best candy in teh whole wide world i loveeee them!!! i go to blockbuster and buy three huge tubs and consume them all in one sitting!!!!! you are INSANE if youthink that Sour Patch Kids are better IIINNNSSSAANNNEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Reply
  19. KC

    Sour Jacks kick Sour Patch Kids ass. I have to search all over town to buy them as my local theaters don’t carry them.

    Reply
  20. abbs

    sour jacks are my fave candy of all times!they win my vote over sour patch any day… im going to my local blockbuster tomorrow thanks guys.

    Reply
  21. IAmSourJackAndISuck

    I hate sour jacks they are disgusting and they taste like gummy vitamins that expired about fifteen years ago, and are in no way shape or form even comparable to sour patch.

    Reply
  23. sour plus jacks equals win

    You guys are on crack if you think sour patch kids even comes close to being as good as sour jacks. sour patch kids are like donkey shit compressed with coloring added to them. SOUR JACKS FOR LIFE !!!

    Reply
  24. Rodious

    Everytime….EVERYTIME I go to the store my brother in law says get Sour Jacks. Yes, if you’re wondering Food Lion carries Sour Jacks under their brand name. Food Lion is a Grocery Store in the Mid Atlantic Region down into the South East. EATING THEM SHITS RIGHT NOW AND GOOGLING THEM B/C SOUR JACKS DESTROY

    Reply
  25. Rodious

    Let me elaborate, I just got a new puppy and I love him more than anything. I mean we do everything together and he is the best. That being said I would gladly push him in front of a train to have a life time supply of Sour Jacks.

    THINK ABOUT THAT

    Sour Patch Kids blow

    Reply
  26. M

    Yes, and thank god they’re not. It’s a CRIME Sour Patch Kids can be found everywhere and yet I have to order Sour Jacks online. Jacks are, EASILY, 100% better than Kids. Texture and softness, size, flavor — Sour Jacks win in every single category. AMC theaters are the best, too.

    Reply
  27. Damnhell

    I’ve never read any of your posts before, but when searching the web for “Why are sour patch kids so good?” I found this post. From this alone I am pretty much in love with you. We should probably get married. Just saying.

    Reply
  28. Brian

    SOUR JACKS WIN FOREVER! Sour Patch Kids are like top 40 music, people think it’s best because it’s all they know. Sour Patch Kids is like Taylor Swift and Sour Jacks are like Radiohead. Radiohead is amazing.

    Reply
  29. cool kid

    Im in high school and they were selling sour jacks i bought some and i fell inlove with them then the fundraise girls stoped selling them and i couldnt find sourjacks anywhere soo i bought some soutpatches they look like shit next to sourjacks they are nothing like them sourjacks are soft and souri and sour patches are hard makes your teeth hurt sour jacks are thebest candy for me

    Reply
  30. Ed

    Sour Jacks are really good. I just bought some Sour Patch Kids and to me they are not as tasty and as sour as sour jakes. I can tell though through the people writing that it is just a matter of preference like most things.

    Reply
  32. Barak

    Sour Jacks DESTROY SPK… I mean, don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against SPK, but… Sour Jacks are on another level.

    The author of this post is clearly not fit to be talking about candy.

    Reply
  33. Sour Jake

    Your are a idiot an clearly a huge nerd Sour Jacks are way better than Sour patch kids. Your “palate” is what speaks of horse shit

    Reply
  34. lemme get a sour jack baby

    …is this even a conversation? Sour Jacks taste like God invented a flavor called “Blessing” and compacted it into a little gummy candy. I don’t even eat them, I just put them on my tongue and let them marinate on top of my taste buds. When I eat Sour Jacks I realize why I’m alive…I realize why we were put here on Earth. If my dog were dying I could put a Sour Jack on top of him and the angelic flavor would seep into his soul and not only would it revive him, it would make him a better dog. Sour Jacks are God’s mini miracles in a box.

    Reply
    • Marie

      Hahahaha…I LOVE the reply titled “lemme get a sour jack baby.” I must repost that comment to FB. Sorry there is no name for cred. I like SPKs, but I like SJs better. I first discovered them at Carowinds, a theme park that is located near Charlotte, NC. They sell them for the outrageous price of about $3.50 for a quarter pound.

      Reply

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